One more reason people think unequal division is fair

I thought of just one more reason why women think that the existing unequal division of labor is fair – they don’t think that any other option is possible. If you are convinced that an equitable division is impossible, then you are forced think an unequal division is fair – it is the fairest of all available options. It’s funny, because now that I’ve thought of it, this seems like the most obvious reason why this unequal division would be called “fair.”

This idea actually came to me on considering some of the reaction to the equally shared parenting story in the NY Times featuring Marc and Amy Vashon. There was lots of the reaction that amounted to, “But this just won’t work for me (or for most people) because … (fill in a reason).” (the nastier version of the critique boiled down to “This idea totally sucks because I can’t do it.”) It is absolutely true that equally shared parenting won't work for many families, but that is not because it's a dumb idea, but rather because of economic inequity between men and women, our crazy work culture, and the constrictions that are placed on us by traditional gender roles.